[ Wind whistling ]
All right, everyone, listen up.
I don't know about you,but I, for one,
am sick and tired of hate speech
that servesto marginalize others.
[ Speaking foreign language ]
[ Gulp ] Ahh.
You know, if there's one thingthat makes me sick,
it's when a race thinksthey're superior
and don't know howto check their privilege.
An African American flipsa turtle over on its back.
A transgenderFilipino comes
and sees the helpless turtlebaking in the sun.
What color isthe Filipino's father?
I didn't thinkyou were human.
Yeah, everybody's prettyfreaked out over here, baby.
Everyone is on edgeand feeling really nervous.
That sounds terrible.Be careful, Butters.
I will, honey.
Butters, get tothe bathroom. Now.
All right, Kyle,what's this about?
I know the whole story.PC Principal killed him
and tried to kill Leslie,but she got away.
Mrph rmh rmphm?
PC Principal is partof a huge network of radicals
who kill everyone that doesn'tfollow their PC ideology.
How do you know all this?
Because Leslie's with me.I'm keeping her safe.
[ Chuckles ]♪ Kyle's got a girlfriend
It gets worse.
Someone in our town helpedthese people come here.
That personfaked the Bill Cosby joke
to getPrincipal Victoria fired.
Who would use a Cosby joketo push their own agenda?
I think it's obvious --Stan's dad.
Stan, your dad isone of them.
He had to be the onethat let them in!
You're letting paranoia andsuspicion get the better of you.
There's no way to knowwho we can trust.
So, what do we do now?
There's only one thingwe can do.
We have to get guns.
It's the only way for usto be safe.
Kyle, even if we thoughtit could help protect us,
how are we all going toget our hands on guns?
[ Guns cocking ]
All right, cool.We got guns.
So, now what?
Mrph rmhmhm rm!
I already feela lot safer!
You guys lay lowand watch your backs.
I'm gonna gokeep Leslie protected.
Don't fall too hard,partner.
Do I look sweet,Butters?
[ Chuckles ] Yeah.
Can you passthe garlic bread, Randy?
Why wouldn't I be ableto pass the garlic bread?
Dad, where were youlast night?
What? When?Where was I what?
Out. With friends.Doing things.
Well, I'm full.
I'm gonna go work in the garagefor a little bit.
Work on what?
On stuffthat do things.
Um, oh, I'm gonna takesome of this with me.
I'm still hungry.
Thought you just saidyou were full.
What am I, on trialor something?!
You guys are reallyacting strange.
All right.We're good.
Nobody suspects a thing.
Take a look at this.
We've got everythingfrom PC Principal's hard drive.
He was on to the gentrificationaround the world,
and he was convinced
that whatever was responsiblewasn't human.
Not human?Then what?
I don't careif they're aliens or vampires.
We need toround 'em up fast
and [bleep] themtill they're dead.
You don't wantto [bleep] a vampire.
You'll get hepatitis.
Oh, girlfriend,I am well beyond that.
[ Chuckles ]
Oh, my God.Don't you see what this means?
If something not humanis gentrifying the entire world,
soon no human will be ableto afford it.
They're trying to priceour species out of existence.
Well, how do you likemy new apartment?
What happened to you,Nathan?
I always thoughtyou were a nice kid.
Now you've got a gun?
Oh, everyone's gettingone of these now, Jim.
Nobody knows who to trust.
Yeah? Well,guns are never the answer.
Don't you kind of wishyou'd had one
back when Leslie betrayed youand nearly beat you to death?
Oh. I guess it would have beena decent answer then.
You see, I've gotexpensive tastes, Jimmy.
I like good food,organic pressed juices,
and I've got a thingfor high-class prostitutes.
Have you been introducedto my current girlfriend?
My name is Classiwith an "I,"
and a little dickhanging off the "C"
that bends aroundand [bleep] the "L"
out of the"A"-"S"-"S."
Nice to meet you,Classi.
All I had to dowas work for the ads,
and I goteverything I wanted --
My own loft with all ofShiTpaTown right at my doorstep.
All it took was some PC, and thewhole thing was set in motion.
So, now ads are using PCfor their own gains?
That's a new low.
What is PC but a verbal formof gentrification?
Spruce everything up,get rid of all the ugliness
in order to createa false sense of paradise.
Only one thing can actually livein that world -- ads.
I know I've set it before,but man, do I hate ads.
Eric Cartman, I told youto go get ready for bed!
Yeah, I just want to finishthis movie.
No, Eric,this is a school night.
Mom,I'm into this movie.
I'm not going to bedright now. Chillax.
You most certainly are.
Right now, mister!
I will go to bedwhen this movie is over, Mom.
Eric!Where did you get that?!
Turn off the lightand go back to bed.
I'm staying up.
Eric, you march right upto your room, and you --
I don't think so, Mom.
Eric, you getyour butt to bed!
No means no,Bill Cosby!
I told you to go upstairsright now!
Whoa, Mom,what the hell?
I'm not going totell you again, Eric.
It is timefor night-night!
Mom, put down the gun.
I am your mother, and you willdo what I tell you!
Okay, I am going!
Well, then you goright now, mister!
I am going to bed Mom!Chillax.
All right, then! No comic books!Just straight to sleep!
I love you, sweetie!
Okay. I love you too, Mom.Night-night.
[ Door shuts ]
Wow, he -- he listened.
some clue as to whatwe're dealing with.
The news storiesPC Principal researched
are all so contradictory,
as if whateverthese things are
have controlover the news somehow.
That soundslike vampires to me.
We have to find out who had mefired with the Cosby joke.
It's the key to knowingwhat we're dealing with.
Mr. Garrison?Caitlyn Jenner?
Stan, what the hellare you doing in here?!
Tell mewhat's going on, Dad.
Nothing.We're just hanging out,
talking about Coldplay,all right?
No! I want to know what the hellis going on right now!
What are you doingwith that?
Kyle saidI couldn't trust you.
What are youplanning, Dad?
Stan, it isn'twhat you think.
Then what is it?
Look, I need to show yousomething, okay?
You needto see this, son.
Ooh! Psych! Now putthe [bleep] gun down, bitch!
I'm gonna go tell Mom!
Oh, yeah?You go tell her.
I'll tell you had a gun.
You'll bein more trouble than me!
Stan, I am your dad.
Put the gun downand sit over there.
Took a lot to hunt you down,PC Principal.
You mind telling me why you'regoing around the world
shooting up revitalizedarts and foods districts?
You wouldn't believe meif I told you.
I don't know what they are,but they used me
and others like meto try and change the planet.
You don't knowwhat who are?
Sir, the President ison the phone.
Wants to talk to youabout PC Principal.
Yes, Mr. President.
I see, sir.Yes, I understand.
We're to release himimmediately --
No questions asked.
And we're not supposed tobelieve anything he tells us.
Huh.Ain't that a peach?
He's being set free now,Mr. President.
Can I tellthe commander why?
[ As Obama ] This is a matterof national security.
I understand, sir.
Thank you.God Bless you.
God Bless you,too, sir.
And may God Blessthe United States of America.
Yeah, justfeeling butterflies,
and my handsare freezing.
Thank you, Kyle.
Don't worry, Leslie.
I won't let anythinghappen to you.
I'm warning you -- You're onthe wrong side of this.
We're just tryingto get answers.
You pulled a gunon our son, Randy!
He pulled oneon me first, Sharon!
Because you wouldn'ttalk to me, Dad!
Stanley, let your mother and Ideal with this.
I told youto leave him alone!
God,I hate this family!
Why are you alwaystaking Stan's side?!
Whoa! Whoa! Shelly!
Put down the gun,Shelly!
You're always acting like Stancan't do anything wrong!
She doesn't alwaystake my side!
You shut up or I swear to GodI'll use this.
Shelly,put it down now.
You don't even tryto know me, Dad!
I want to, Shelly!
I just sometimes feellike you hate me!
I feel like you hate me, Randy!
I don't hate you!I love you!
I need to be a better husband,a better father!
We all need to be betterto each other!
Okay, maybe I needto stop being so angry!
I love you guys.
We love you,too, Dad.
We just want to knowwhat's going on with you.
All right,I'll tell you everything.
Wow. These thingsare amazing.
[ Cash register dings ]
All right,Mrs. Farnickle, enjoy.
And remember -- If the safety'son, you're good as gone.
Okay, and next customer,please.
Ah, going forthe big one, huh?
You must be feelingextra jumpy!
you don't knowthe half of it.
Well, this thing should make youfeel more at ease.
You know, you ought tocheck out the gun show.
The gun show?
Yeah, it's gonna haveeverything,
and with guns being so popular,
practically everyone in town isgonna be in attendance.
The entire townin one location?
Oh, my God.
We need a news headlinethat will draw him back to town.
Oh, you're going to
sponsor my contentsome more, baby?
I'm all ears.
I've got to get tothe Super School News.
Hey, Classi, do you thinkyou could get me my crutches?
[ Tsks ] Naw.
I don't thinkNathan would like that.
You seem likea reasonable person.
Do you really want to livein a world controlled by ads?
I mean come on, Classy.
No, it's Classi.With an "I."
The little dickthat hangs off the "C"
[bleep] the "L"out of the ass.
Sorry. My bad.
Look, I'm a news reporter, Claaassi,
and in a world where adscontrol the news,
there's no way to be sureanyone's ever hearing the truth.
Truth about what?
We have to let people knowPC is the enemy
before it's too late.
Leslie, we don't knowwho is on their side.
We have stay safe.
The principal isgoing to try
and make upsome crazy story.
That's what PC people do.
You have to getin front of everyone
and tell themwhat you've learned!
I...gave upgiving speeches.
I came to youbecause I had heard
how good you wereat getting messages across.
That and because...I thought you were cute.
I'm sure I'd have no problemgiving a speech
if you could beby my side.
well, I can't go with you,you know. It's too dangerous.
Not if we go somewhere
that's completely safefrom any violence.
Where?The gun show.
There'll be so many gunsthat nothing bad can happen.
with the new principal?
Yes, they wantedto use his PC
as a means to startgentrification in our town.
That's why we thoughtPC Principal was behind it,
but now we know they were justusing his PC abilities
to servicetheir own needs.
When the pussy crusher storycame out in Super School News,
it started to make PC Principalquestion himself.
He started digging for answers.They didn't like that.
So, they tried to distractand mislead him with this.
[ Keyboard clicking ]
Sorry. Wait. That's an adfor McDonald's. Hold on.
With this --Ugh, there's that ad again.
God, these thingsare annoying.
Anyways,whatever these beings are,
they try to keep anyonefrom knowing the truth from --
Ugh, I don't want to seea slide show.
PC Principal said somethingwas trying to divert
and distract hissubconscious mind with this.
Wait, that's Leslie.
Oh, my God.It's Kyle.
Kyle's been protecting Leslie.They're together.
He's been making everyonefeel paranoid
and saying you're the enemy, Dad.
Well, then,it's time to go ask Kyle
why he sold outhis own kind.
How will we get himto talk?
We're going to kill himwith kindness.
But instead of kindness,we're going to use guns.
Come on! Let's go!
Shelly,you take care of Grandpa!
No, no, no.Don't shoot Grandpa.
Just literallytake care of him.
[ Guns cocking ]
Buckle up, buckaroos!
[ Dog barks ]
What is that?
The newest editionof Super School News,
hitting the streetstomorrow.
"Tragedy at Gun Show."
What happenedat the gun show?
Not what's happened,what's going to happen.
The final sweepingunderneath the rug.
By this time tomorrow,
nobody will beasking questions ever again.
The ads will have won,and I will be the man.
I think the adsare playin' yo ass.
Shut up, Classi!
Oh, hell, no!
Oh, hell no, your Down syndromeass just slapped me.
I'mma breakyo dick off!
Hang on, Classi.I'm sorry.
I will bustyo [bleep] ass!
I will bustyo [bleep] nose!
I ain't nomimsy-ass ho!
I'm a classy bitch,
and I do not...
controlling my news!
[ Groans ]
Classi, thank you!
You need my help?You gots it.
I need your phoneto call Officer Barbrady,
and we have to get tothat gun show fast!
Quick, tothe Classi-mobile!
[ Engine turns over ]
ANNOUNCER: Welcome backto the South Park Gun Show.
We've hadover 2,000 gorgeous guns
come throughthis arena today.
It's been whittled downto seven,
the winnersfrom each group.
David,take us down the line.
DAVID: First, we havethe beautiful Yorkshire .33mm
with proud ownerSteven Stotch.
An absolutely gorgeous gun,David.
The playful and lovelyAustralian semi-automatic,
owned by Father Maxi.
And there's the Mayorwith her delightful
Rhodesian Ridgebackshotgun/rifle mix.
That's a favoriteof the crowd here.
Always a favoriteat these shows.
That's a nice gunright there.
The judge now asking to seethat Yorkshire .33mm up close.
And there it is --Just a beautiful gun in motion.
Everybody loves it.
[ Applause ]
Looks like the judgewants to take another look
at thatshotgun/rifle mix.
[ Applause ]
And next up will be the --
Nobody move![ Crowd screaming ]
Everyone just staywhere you are!
ANNOUNCER:And it looks like the gun showis under attack, David.
[ Screaming stops ]
Yes, six armed gunmenhave entered the arena,
one of which is carryingan absolutely gorgeous
little PekingeseGlock 17.
Listen to me, everyone!
There are beingswho are purposely
gentrifying the Earth
so that humanscan no longer afford it.
We've been lookingfor Kyle Broflovski.
Somebody's hiding him.
Don't listen to them!
The real conspiracy hereare the PC extremists
who haveno problem killing
whoever doesn't thinklike they do!
You son of a bitch,Stan.
How could you have sidedwith the enemy?
[Bleep] you, Kyle.You're the enemy.
You've both got it wrong.
Kyle, I knowyou probably thought
Leslie wasa kind, caring girl,
but the truth isshe's just an ad.
They've takenhuman form.
You can't tell what's humanand what's an ad anymore.
Oh, geez.Are you serious?
How am I supposed to[bleep] an ad to death?
Ugh, flippin' ads.
They're sucha pain in the ass.
You told meJimmy was dead.
So, now we know who gotPrinciple Victoria fired.
Nobody move, m'kay!
Everyone juststay where you are!
Yes, I wantedPrinciple Victoria fired,
but I didn't wantany of this!
You got me fired? Why?!
18 years of answering to you --18 years!
You always telling mewhat to do.
If you had problems with me,why didn't you just talk to me?
You never listened!
Nobody listens to me!
They just expect meto listen to them!
Maybe we shouldhave realized
that sometimes a counselorneeds counseling!
I don't know.Maybe I got manipulated
by these ads,too, somehow,
but I should have beena better person!
We all could be better people --all of us!
We all played a part.
Maybe from now on people in thistown need to communicate more!
Care about each other!
If we're going to defeatour enemies,
that's what it's going totake -- all of us, together!
[ Sighs ]
If only we'd had thesebefore, huh?
Every time you block us,we get smarter.
Every time you try to stop us,we are more.
If one plan fails,we will plan another.
You will neverbe rid of ads.
PC PRINCIPAL:Hey, Leslie!
Your species took PC andtwisted it for evil purposes.
That pisses me off!
Well, I guess there's justone last thing to take care of.
Why couldn't we try to liveon this planet together?!
Maybe we're not perfect beings,but we built a better town!
We didn't need youto do that!
And we'll keep on tryingto make it better!
Randy, you're yellingat a Whole Foods.
Go on! Get out of here!
Others will know!
It isn't going to be so easy,not anymore.
[ Rumbling ]
[ Car alarms blaring ]
PC PRINCIPAL:All right everyone, listen up.
I don't know about you,but I, for one,
am sick and tiredof all the hate speech
and microaggressionsagainst our species.
We have a new enemy out there --an almost invisible foe
that is so bigoted,so racially biased,
they actually thinkwe should all die.
They are tryingto attract our youth,
using tactics that areunderhanded and unfair.
But no matter how hardthey hit us,
we cannot let them takefrom us our PC.
And so, I have been askedto stay on as your principal.
A lot of changes will happenin the coming months.
The bottom line isthat the only thing
that distinguishesthose who want to kill us
from those who don't isthat we have the burning desire
for social justice.
We are at war,but the only way to win this war
is to be as understanding,non-biased,
and politically correctas possible.
This is gonna bereally hard.
PC Principal Final Justice
Kyle has chosen a dangerous alliance over his friendship with Stan.